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Robyn M
Speed |
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When something good happens in your life, buy flowers. That way you will associate the flower and scent with something positive, and whenever you see that flower or smell that scent you will feel uplifted. However, when bad things happen, do not buy flowers or go to a coffee shop. The whole point of this approach is to develop great associations with flowers, scents and aromas. If I bought a bunch of freesias to cheer myself up after being reprimanded by my boss, or after I had been made redundant or failed an exam, that flower and scent would always be associated with that episode, it would be a reminder of something less than terrific, and would inspire negative feelings. If I bought a bunch of yellow roses, or even one single yellow rose, after I got some really great news, passed an exam, or got a pay rise, I would be reminded of those joys and emotions every time I looked at or smelt a yellow rose. It would be a look and a scent that brought positive feelings. And what is wrong with my buying a spray of orchids for my husband when he calls me to say he got a pay rise, or a promotion? Or, maybe I could buy a bag of special blend coffee grounds so that when he got home from work the kitchen--which is, after all, the hub of the household--would be filled with the aroma of percolating coffee. He would, from then on, associate that smell with something positive, uplifting, and encouraging. However, he would, after that point, be forbidden by me to ever enter a Starbucks or similar premises unless he was in a good mood or he would spoil the effect of my plan! A child might not have a huge appreciation of flowers and might be too young for coffee, so when they do something great, swim a length of the pool, do well in a test, or pass a martial arts grading, we should bake them a cake or a batch of cookies. Their celebration would be associated with both the aroma of that baking and the taste. After that every time they smelt cake or cookies baking in the oven they would feel positive and happy. For me the smell of cake or cookies baking in the oven carries with it a sense of security, of maternal protectiveness, of childhood delight, of special treats in the sun, of a loving home. Men, do not buy flowers for your partner when you have had a fight. Every time she sees those flowers she will be reminded that you fought, and what you really want is for her to forget about that fight. If you really did ‘screw up’, apologize, do the dishes, do the ironing, but don’t buy her flowers. We often buy flowers for other people, or to send to a funeral, but how often do we buy flowers for our self? My new philosophy is that whenever something really good happens in my life I am going to go and buy flowers. For my children, I will bake. It is time we stopped confining our celebrations to the really big stuff—engagements, wedding, births, graduations—and made a commitment to celebrate the small stuff too. Let’s make our world a place where everywhere we look we feel positive and uplifted, reminded of the great moments in our lives—a world where something as simple as walking past a florist shop and seeing a yellow rose immediately lifts our mood. Flowers are a celebration of nature, so it seems only fitting that we bring that into our own celebrations. The look and scent of flowers, the aroma wafting from the coffee pot, the sweet smell of cakes or cookies baking in the oven, these simple things really can elevate your mood, and bring more happiness and positivity into your daily life.
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© Robyn M Speed |
